This sure is a good life! Every morning, my servant brings me food and water, then he speaks kindly to me while I eat my fill. After that, it’s off to roam the countryside while the grown-ups head to work. I spend the day running, jumping, and kicking up my heels with the other children. I splash around in the stream, find succulent treats to eat, and nap in the warm sunshine. If the weather is too hot, I can always find a shady spot to rest under some trees or among the rocks. Oh, I know that there is more to life than playing with my friends, but there will be plenty of time for that other stuff later. Eventually, I will get to use my great strength to perform important work, just like my parents, but for now, I just want to run and play.

Earlier today I caught my reflection in a pool of water, and I can scarcely believe how much I’ve grown! My body has become stocky and solid, and muscle can be seen rippling beneath the skin of my shoulders and legs. Why, it shouldn’t be too much longer until I get to start training for work! I have to admit, I am a little jealous of my two older friends who have already begun their training. When I saw them the other day, they were bragging about how strong they are and how much weight they could carry. I’m sure that I am just as strong as they are – probably stronger. I bet I can lift as much as the two of them put together! Boy, I can’t wait until the day I get to start working. I’ll show everyone just how strong I am. People will be amazed, and they will clap their hands and cheer when they see what I can do!

Boy, what a day! After breakfast this morning, the man who brought my food let me follow him around as he finished his chores. He even let me carry the bag of feed when he went to feed the chickens. It’s not like I got to do any important work, but it still felt good. I could see the jealousy in the eyes of the younger boys, and some of the girls seemed to look at me with admiration. Did that ever make me stand tall and walk proud! I helped him all morning, then went out to play with my friends in the afternoon. I heard him say that I could help him again tomorrow, and that later in the week (it makes me quiver with excitement thinking about it) he is going to take me into the village to buy supplies. I can hardly wait!

These last couple of days have been kind of strange. True to his word, the servant who brings our food let me help him complete his daily chores. While I have enjoyed it, I have noticed a change with my friends. The younger kids seemed to want to hang around me and ask questions about the chores I was doing, but those closer to my age seemed to be a little stand-offish. They will be gathered in conversation when I come out to play, but then get quiet and sort of scatter as I arrive. Maybe it’s my imagination, but it seems like they don’t like me much anymore. Perhaps they are a little jealous because I get to do things and they don’t. This is making me nervous about the trip into the village at the end of the week. I am excited about it and can hardly wait, but now I’m afraid all my friends won’t talk to me afterward. My parents say that I shouldn’t let it bother me, and that if they are truly my friends they will be happy for me. I guess I will find out soon enough how they will react to me going into the village since tomorrow is the big day! Now if I can only get some sleep…

The day finally arrived when my friend (I no longer think of him as a servant) was going to take me into town. I barely slept last night in anticipation and nervousness, but I had no idea just how crazy my day would be. Everything started out like normal. I woke up, had breakfast, then helped with the morning chores. We then headed down the road together, me carrying some empty sacks that I assumed we would fill with supplies. It was just a short walk to the market. My friend had me stay at the edge of the street while he bargained with another man about the price of some grain. That’s when things got weird. As I was standing around, minding my own business, a couple of strangers walked up to me. I had seen them when they walked into town, and they seemed kind of excited when they saw me. Now, I love attention as much as the next guy, but these guys kind of freaked me out. My friend came over and yelled at them for messing with me, and I was sure glad to see him! They all talked for a minute, then my friend walked over and put his hand on my shoulder. He said that I needed to go with the strangers because they had an important job for me to do. I was both scared and thrilled at the same time! My friend encouraged me and told me that I would be fine. He stood in the street as we walked away. When I glanced back, he gave me a friendly wave. I turned my head forward and followed the strangers.

Although I was a little nervous walking away from town, and away from my friend, I was excited beyond belief. An important job needed to be done, and these men had chosen me to do it! I had always known that I was destined for greatness, and now was my chance. If only my friends at home could see me now… After walking a short distance, we came to a small crowd of people. That’s when I heard something that made my heart skip a beat. They wanted me to go into the City! They said I was supposed to carry some guy on my shoulders. Finally, everyone was going to see just how strong I am. I quickly picked the guy up and started up the hill. Everyone was so excited that they began to shout and cheer, just like I had always dreamed. People started spreading palm branches and coats in front of me so I’d have a soft carpet to walk on and my feet wouldn’t get dirty from the dust of the road. I couldn’t make out what the people were shouting, but one word was clearly repeated over and over – King. They were calling me their King! Well… I just held my head high, puffed out my chest, and boldly marched right into the City with the cheers of my people echoing in my ears. I was on top of the world! I didn’t realize just how quickly my world would come crashing down.

Once we were inside the city, I put down the man I had been carrying. He walked away, pausing briefly to thank me for carrying him. The crowds, my adoring fans, all followed him as he walked down the street. I was left standing there all alone. Ashamed and embarrassed, I realized what a fool I had been. The people weren’t cheering for me. They didn’t care anything about me. They were cheering for that man, whoever he was. I was nothing but the donkey that carried him. I felt like a complete moron. To make matters worse, now I was alone in a strange city with nowhere to go. I was completely alone. There were people all around me, but nobody paid me any attention. Why should they? I am nothing but a young fool who thought he was somebody special. Tired, dejected, and with tears in my eyes, I started trying to find my way home.

What a miserable day! I finally arrived home late last night, but sleep eluded me even though I was exhausted. Breakfast came, along with the morning chores, but it was no longer a pleasure. I now realize that I have been living a lie. Yesterday’s events taught me that my friend, who I always believed to be my servant, was actually my master. He controls my life and is just using me for his own benefit. I’m not his helper; I’m his slave. Apparently, my “little adventure” (as he called it) proved to him that I am able to work more, so he made me carry stuff for him all day. He didn’t care that I was tired or sad. He just drug me behind him to the village and made me carry sacks full of the supplies he purchased yesterday while I was off acting like a fool. I did hear quite a bit of talk along the road and in town. Everyone seemed to be discussing yesterday’s events. At least they weren’t talking about me. They kept talking about the man I had carried to the City. A lot of people think he is some great leader or teacher, but others argue that he is a dangerous troublemaker. Toward the end of the day, news arrived that there had been orders issued for the man’s arrest. Wouldn’t you know it? Not only had I acted like a fool, but in the process, I had aided a criminal. I guess it’s a good thing that everyone forgot about me, or else I might get in trouble for helping him. All I know is that I’m tired and I just want to get some sleep.

It’s hard for me to explain how I feel about what has happened. I really don’t want to write it down, but maybe it is best to try to articulate my thoughts. My brain won’t stop thinking about that man I carried to the City. Apparently, his name is Jesus. People keep debating about whether He is a good man or a trouble-maker. They say that He might even be the promised King. I don’t know much about the man, but I do know this: He was kind to me, I felt good when I was with Him, and coming into contact with Him has changed my life. But none of that matters now, because He is dead! The religious leaders convinced the “powers that be” to crucify the man, along with a couple of common criminals. Everyone knows that they did it out of jealousy and fear – fear that they were losing their control over the people. My heart is broken. First I thought that I was somebody big and important when I carried Jesus into the City. Then I realized that I was a fool and a nobody. Now, it turns out that I basically carried Him to His death! Oh, what a miserable, wretched creature I am! Even if nobody remembers me and the part I played in this man’s death, surely my Creator won’t forget! Even if God doesn’t smite me dead for what I have done, I’m sure that I am destined for eternal damnation. If it wasn’t for me, maybe Jesus wouldn’t have died. I may as well have driven the nails myself.

My life seems like a blur since the death of Jesus. I have all of these thoughts and emotions swirling inside of me. I can’t enjoy the work that I was so excited about doing. I avoid my friends because I don’t want them to find out what I have done. They probably already know anyway, and I’m sure they would rather not associate with somebody like me. I feel like crying when I think about how kind Jesus was to me, even as I carried Him to the cross. Surely He knew what was going to happen to him in the City, so why did He go? If I hadn’t been so caught up in my own pride, maybe I could have seen the danger and taken Him somewhere else. If I wasn’t such a selfish fool, things would be different. My life really holds no meaning to me now, yet I fear death and the punishment that I know is coming. I really don’t know why God doesn’t just kill me and get it over with. Maybe it’s to torture me, letting me live with my guilt and shame rather than simply destroying me. I wish there was some way that I could fix everything and undo my mistakes. I wish it would all just go away and I could start fresh, but what’s done is done.

 I really don’t know what I am going to do or how I am going to go on living. Today was just another day of drudgery and hard labor. The hot sun and dusty roads do nothing but add misery to my wretched life. Sometimes I dream of better things, or I find myself wishing I could go back to carrying Jesus. That was such an amazing experience! Then I remember my humiliation when the crowds walked away and the horror I felt when I found out that He had been killed. I realize that the way I felt when I was with Him is gone forever. Maybe someday things will change, or perhaps time will help dull the pain. I hope so. For now, it seems that all I have left is this back-breaking labor and my torturous memories. And you know what? I know that I deserve nothing less.

 Okay… I had the strangest thing happen today. I was walking down the road when I passed three travelers. They were in a fairly animated discussion, although it seemed one of them was doing most of the talking. The strange thing was that the one talking seemed oddly familiar to me. I turned my head to look at him, and he actually looked directly into my eyes and smiled as if he recognized me too. Only one other person has ever smiled at me like that – Jesus. Of course, He’s dead so I knew it wasn’t Him. Toward evening, I was standing on the street in town when two men came bursting out of a nearby door. They were all worked up and talking excitedly, then they practically ran out of town toward the City. I couldn’t hear everything they said, but I distinctly caught the name Jesus as they rushed past me. The thing is, I recognized them as the travelers I passed earlier! The third traveler (the one who had smiled at me) wasn’t with them any longer. Could it be that their companion had actually been Jesus? Did I see Him again today? I know that sounds impossible, but maybe the rumors I had been hearing are true after all. There has been some talk about the body of Jesus being missing, but I just figured it was all nonsense. But… maybe not. Maybe I did see Jesus today!

 The news has been spreading for weeks now. Jesus is alive! Most people seem pretty skeptical about it, but there are many eyewitnesses who have seen Him teaching his followers. I believe it since I saw Him myself! I am so relieved that He smiled at me that day on the road because it let me know that He isn’t holding my role in His death against me. Maybe the fact that He knew He was going to rise again made it easier for Him to tolerate the ones who treated Him badly. It’s hard to say. Wouldn’t it be great to feel like death is no big deal? Knowing that you can be raised from the dead would definitely take the sting out of dying! I feel much better about my life simply because I know that Jesus is alive. Who knows what it means to all of us. There is talk that He will overthrow the Romans and take over the country. Some say He is going to take over the whole world. From what I’ve heard about His teachings, it sounds like He is the leader that the world needs, but I don’t know His plans. Whatever those plans are, the fact that He was able to rise from the grave proves that He can do anything. I just wish I could be around Him more and stay close to Him. I would love to be a part of whatever He is doing!

 Today has been another amazing, strange, confusing day. It’s been over a month since Jesus rose from the grave, and He has apparently been spending most of His time teaching His most devoted followers. This morning, He led them out of the City towards Bethany. I got to go along since my master’s mother wanted to go and she needed a ride. We all gathered around Jesus while He spoke. His teachings today seemed to be more like commandments. He said He wanted His disciples to travel all over the world and tell people the good news about Him. He also talked about a promise from God, about receiving power, and about a Comforter. He commanded them to wait in the City until they received the power, and then they were to scatter throughout the world. That’s when I saw something incredible. He lifted His hands, and then He started floating into the sky! He went straight up into the clouds and disappeared. Well, we all just stood there, mouths hanging open, staring at those clouds. Then two angels (they must have been angels) appeared out of nowhere and said to stop staring, and that someday Jesus would come back again. Talk about mixed emotions! I was sad to see Him go, but happy knowing that He was in Heaven and excited that He would return. The whole group was buzzing with excitement as they began the journey back to the City. We walked with the crowd for a while before turning toward home. What a day!

 In my short life, I have learned to love Pentecost! The days leading up to it are filled with preparation and anticipation, while the roads to the City are packed with travelers. Since we live so close, we don’t have to hit the road as soon as others, but we always go up the day before and spend the night in the City. Talk about a crowd! You can’t even count the people that are there from all over the place. This year, Pentecost came very soon after all the events involving Jesus. Many of His followers (which now includes my master and his family) gathered together in a big room to pray, worship God, and to talk about everything Jesus had taught them. I was waiting outside, and I just felt like something huge was about to happen. Then, it did! Before I heard anything, I felt it. Something started happening inside that meeting room, and it caused my hair to stand on end. Then I started hearing shouting and cries of excitement coming from inside. The sound grew louder, but it wasn’t the sound of panic or alarm. Instead, it sounded like a celebration of utmost joy. People on the street heard it too, and they started to gather around. Suddenly the doors burst open and the disciples started coming out. Every last one of them seemed to have a glow upon them, and they were shouting praises to God. Many had tears of joy running down their faces. Some danced. Others ran around the building, waving their hands in the air. Several of them were jumping up and down. All were shouting, but their words seemed strange to me, as if they were speaking in a different language. There’s so much more to tell, but I must go for now. I’ll write more about it later.

 Back to Pentecost… The crowd around the building grew quickly as word spread about the odd event I described last time. People were speculating as to what was happening. Some thought it was just a party getting out of hand, but most people believed they were witnessing something supernatural. Folks from all over, speaking different dialects, declared that the disciples were praising and glorifying God. Then an expectant hush fell over the crowd as the men who had been closest to Jesus stood together and motioned for the crowd’s attention. One of the disciples began to speak loudly and clearly. He declared that what we were hearing was the fulfillment of Joel’s prophecy about God pouring out His Spirit on mankind. He then gave a brief lesson on the scriptures that would put any scholar to shame. He started from God calling Abraham, and explained how He had worked in the people of Israel since that time. He referenced the words of King David, and how he had spoken of one to come who would be his Lord. Using all the prophecies given, he explained how God Himself had promised to come in the flesh to bring deliverance. You could have heard a pin drop when he explained that Jesus, who the people of Israel had recently killed, was that promised Messiah! Panic swept through the crowd as they realized the truth of what he said. Then came a cry from the people: “What do we do now?” I know I was asking the same question….

The speaker at Pentecost, whose name I have since learned was Peter, gave an amazing response to the crowd’s question about what they were supposed to do now that Jesus had been killed. He told them that there was a very clear path to making things right in their lives. He said to repent and be baptized in the name of Jesus, and that this would provide remission of all their sins. He then said that each person who did so would receive the gift of the Holy Ghost, just like Joel had prophesied and just like what had happened to all those in the upper room that day. Peter went on to say that this was available to anyone, anywhere, from now on into the future. It didn’t matter who they were, where they were born, what language they spoke, or how much they possessed. Everyone was invited to participate in this salvation plan. Boy, did that crowd respond! Thousands of people began to rush forward to be baptized and filled with the Spirit of Jesus. Needless to say, it was quite a while before we got back home, exhausted but feeling more joy than I ever thought possible.

Things sure have been different since Pentecost. Every day, more and more people have flocked to the City to hear what is being called the Gospel, or “Good News”. Crowds have been gathering at every body of water for baptisms, and people are overjoyed as they receive the Holy Ghost and start speaking in that strange, heavenly language. I’ve been carrying people and supplies to the City constantly, and I love every minute of it. I feel like I am doing my part to help spread the news about what God is doing. More than once, I carried someone who was crippled or blind to the City, and when we returned they were completely healed and running circles around me. Everywhere I go, I hear people praising God and telling others about what Jesus has done for them. What a wonderful life this is!

As the Gospel continues to spread, more and more people have begun traveling to different cities in order to share it with others. We have joined in that mission, leaving behind our farm and going anywhere Jesus leads us. My friend (I’ve started calling him that again) is very devoted to helping people feel the love and mercy of God. Not everyone believes his message, and some folks openly attack him for rejecting the old traditions. Even when he explains to them the difference between religious tradition and a life of devotion to Jesus, they refuse to accept it. It’s like he’s said many times: man’s religion blinds people to God’s plan of salvation. If only people weren’t so stubborn! They’re missing out on the greatest life they could live.

Time seems to be flying by, and I haven’t had much opportunity to write about what has been happening in my life. Pretty much all of my time is spent in some sort of service. We have joined up with a couple of powerful preachers on their “missionary journeys”. That’s what I call it, since they do seem like they’re on a mission everywhere they go. If I’m not traveling to a different city, then I am working to help support the mission. Sometimes I spend my day helping someone in need or carrying food to a hungry family. I help construct places for people to meet and worship Jesus together. I can’t count the number of sick or hurting people I carry to the ministers, and it never ceases to amaze me when they are completely healed. This life is exhausting at times, but I can’t imagine living any other way.

It looks like our traveling days are over. The missionary team has moved on, but we have decided to stay in a small village to minister to the saints there. My friend preaches about Jesus, teaches the scriptures and explains what they mean, and baptizes anyone who is willing to receive the Gospel. I help in any way I can, and there is plenty to do! We still take short trips now and then, visiting neighboring villages or ministering to some family in need, but for the most part, we stay close to our new home. This is where Jesus wants us to be, and I have grown to love the people of this place. I feel such a burden in my spirit to do all I can to make sure they know about Jesus, and how to walk in the salvation that He has made available to them.

Has it really been that long since I have written? So much has happened that it should be a lifetime, and yet it only feels like it’s been a few days. We have seen the church here grow, shrink, and grow again. We have endured religious attacks, political resistance, false accusations, and misunderstandings about why we are here. We have dedicated supporters, and we have businesses who refuse to work with us. There have been disagreements within our ranks, power struggles, and a loss of focus. We’ve been blessed with generous donations, and we have had times where it looked like we wouldn’t have enough food to get through the week. Through it all, it only takes some devoted prayer and submission to Jesus to get us through. The letters also help more than you can imagine. The letters arrive periodically from the missionaries. They let us know what Jesus is doing all over the place. Sometimes they offer words of encouragement. Other times, they give us instructions on how to handle different situations that arise. They even reprimand us if the leaders believe we’re getting off track. Each letter is a blessing, even if some of the words are hard to hear. Some letters are addressed to us specifically, and others are a general message to all believers. We share these letters among the various churches. I always enjoy carrying letters to neighboring towns, then bringing letters they have received back to read to our congregation. I just love how we’re all doing our own thing, and yet we’re all working together to build the Kingdom of God!

I am feeling rather reflective today. Looking back over my life, I think about all the plans I made as a youngster, my childhood dreams, and what I wanted to be. I suppose it’s good to have hopes and dreams, even though things seldom go as we hope they will. My past is full of mistakes and things I am ashamed of. I boasted about what I was going to do and about how great I was going to be. I acted like a fool, embarrassed my family, and did things that hurt people (and myself). I remember that day going into the City, and how conceited I was in thinking the crowds were cheering for me. I recall the pain of realizing it wasn’t all about me, how angry I was at myself, and how I directed that anger at those around me – especially my family. There was the horror, anguish and despair that I felt when I realized the role I played in killing Jesus, followed by the elation of finding out that He rose from the dead. I vividly recall the relief when Jesus smiled at me and I knew that all was forgiven, and the joy of starting to live for Him. My Pentecost experience transformed my life, and it has been a pleasure to live for God ever since. I’ve had ups and downs, success and setbacks. I’ve done a few things right and made many mistakes. I have witnessed more miracles than I can tell, and yet I still have times where I wonder how I will make it through. Despite heartache and pain, joy and sorrow, defeat and victory, I know one thing for certain. In Jesus my life has purpose, and I am thrilled to be a donkey carrying Jesus!

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